Comment fic meme: Breaking up
Oct. 12th, 2010 04:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
noracharlesAny fandom, any character, any sort of relationship.
Write about a character breaking up with a person they have any sort of relationship with, or a character breaking up with an institution, an organization, an ideal...
Comment with prompts by putting this in the subject line:
Prompt: fandom or just Prompt if it's for any fandom. Feel free to specify characters and relationship types too, if you have any preferences.
Answer any prompts which interest you, and also feel free to comment directly to this entry with an off the cuff ficlet or fragment, or a link to where you've posted it. Reposting previously written fic which fits the theme is fine.
Absolutely no care or effort or beta-reading or editing is expected or required! I'm just hoping someone will entertain me. People I don't know are very welcome indeed ♥
calvinahobbes in both Danish and English
Avatar: The Last Airbender - Mai breaking up with Zuko: Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock byjalendavi_lady in English
Red Dwarf - Rimmer breaking up with the Space Corps: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps byevilawyer in English
White Collar - Neal breaking up with Peter: Four years and counting [White Collar] bysnakeling in English
Write about a character breaking up with a person they have any sort of relationship with, or a character breaking up with an institution, an organization, an ideal...
Comment with prompts by putting this in the subject line:
Prompt: fandom or just Prompt if it's for any fandom. Feel free to specify characters and relationship types too, if you have any preferences.
Answer any prompts which interest you, and also feel free to comment directly to this entry with an off the cuff ficlet or fragment, or a link to where you've posted it. Reposting previously written fic which fits the theme is fine.
Absolutely no care or effort or beta-reading or editing is expected or required! I'm just hoping someone will entertain me. People I don't know are very welcome indeed ♥
Master list
The Aeneid - Dido breaking up with Aeneas: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll bycalvinahobbes in both Danish and EnglishAvatar: The Last Airbender - Mai breaking up with Zuko: Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock by
jalendavi_lady in EnglishRed Dwarf - Rimmer breaking up with the Space Corps: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps by
evilawyer in EnglishWhite Collar - Neal breaking up with Peter: Four years and counting [White Collar] by
snakeling in English![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 06:30 pm (UTC)Also, Nora, if you are bored go play in the bechdel ficathon! *shooing motion*
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 07:30 pm (UTC)I had planned to write a bit yesterday and today, but I keep being overwhelmed by rage or sadness (I wonder if you can guess why, ha), and I know from experience that I write the worst kind of id-fic when I'm feeling like this, and end up feeling worse because I focus on the negative.
Instead I'm cheering myself up reading, and trying to entice other people to write stuff for me ;-)
I just finished "Happyslapped by a Jellyfish" by Karl Pilkington, a very, very funny collection of travel memories. I love that man, he's one of my favorite comedians.
Also, coffee and chocolate!
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 07:35 pm (UTC)I'm sorry you're angsting over that thing. Chocolate and coffee are good distractions!
I do not know Karl Pilkington! What sort of stuff does he do?
Also, you did not answer my question!
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 07:50 pm (UTC)They don't have to be dealing with it in any healthy or constructive way, just experiencing it, if you see what I mean?
Or fic about someone having moved on, and realizing, hey, I'm over it! are also good.
Karl Pilkington tells anecdotes from his life and make humorous observations about things, both putting into words things people are thinking but know better than to say, and weirdly imaginative theories about the why and how of things. He's like Calvin in a thirty-something man's body.
He's currently doing a travel show on Sky 1 where he goes to see the seven wonders of the world, and looking very much like a cat being washed in the sink. He doesn't like crowds or loud noise or surprises or strange food.
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 08:01 pm (UTC)Also, when you put it like that, I find it suddenly odd that I am very fond of Henry Rollins, who also travels a lot and talks about it in his performances. But he is the complete opposite of Karl. He says of himself that he can't sit still, can't shut up, and will try anything at least once. He's like a hyper 12-year-old much of the time, but I love his uber-liberal oppinions. Also, he has a filthy mouth and a buzz cut, and I am nothing if not predictable >-<
I can't think of a pairing! I have a tentative idea, but I'm stomped for characters...
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-12 08:14 pm (UTC)I'm not sure of what characters to suggest, since I don't know if we are in any of the same fandoms? I'm mostly into Supernatural and Merlin at the moment, but I'm happy to read new fandoms too.
I also like Danny from Hawaii 5-0, I like Due South, I like The Sentinel, I like Stargate: Atlantis, I like Grant from Mythbusters, and I don't know... lots of things.
Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-14 02:56 am (UTC)Re: iiinteresting
Date: 2010-10-14 06:24 am (UTC)Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-12 09:27 pm (UTC)Wouldn't it be great if Dido had just thought, "Screw him! I can do so much better! Hell hath no fury as a woman who launches a thousand ships!" *And* the myth would be intact.
The fic goes AU at The Aeneid IV.659, jumping off from O.S. Due's Danish translation, and attempts to adhere to the traditional hexameter ('DUM-da-da-'DUM-da-da etc):
'Skal jeg da 'uhævnet 'dø?" - hun 'skjulte sit 'ansigt på 'sengen -
'Dø for at 'såre den 'utro! hvad 'godt gør at 'vorde en 'skygge?
'Stolt hun sig 'rejste fra 'bålet og 'skuede 'fast ud mod 'havnen.
'Dog skal nu 'flammen fra 'Didos Kar'thago ham 'tjene til 'afsked.
'Højt skal den 'rødeste 'ild og den 'sorteste 'røg herfra 'følge
'ham som et 'ulykkes'varsel på 'rejsen, og 'løgnen bli'r 'straffet:
'Havet skal 'rejse sig 'mod ham så 'bølger og 'hav smelter 'sammen.
'Rygtet skal 'flyve fra 'byens 'mure til 'landet han 'søger.
'Alle skal 'vide at 'Æneas 'svigter og 'lyver for 'Dido.
'Her vil i'midlertid 'jeg stå 'rank og be'skytte mit 'rige;
'Ingen 'mand eller 'tab af min 'ære skal 'vriste mig 'bort fra
'det der er 'mit, og Kar'thago skal 'rejse sig 'stærkt mod An'chiden.
(Aeneas is son of Anchises, thereof the odd appellative in the last verse.)
And freely in English:
Shall I then die unavenged? - She hid her face in tbe bedding -
Die to hurt the unfaithful! What good will it do to become a shadow?
Proudly she rose from the pyre and gazed steadily out on the harbor.
Yet the flame from Dido's Carthage will serve as a goodbye.
High will the crimson flame and the blackest smoke herefrom follow
him as an ill omen on his journey, and his lie will be punished:
The rumor will fly from the city walls to the land he is seeking.
Everyone shall know that Aeneas abandons and deceives Dido.
I however will remain here, steadfast, to protect my kingdom;
No man or loss of dignity will pry me away from
what is mine, and Carthage will rise against the Anchides.
I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY! I should be in bed!
Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 12:39 am (UTC)Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 06:00 am (UTC)Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 09:25 am (UTC)Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 09:30 am (UTC)Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 10:05 am (UTC)The only book I've ever read in Latin was Liber Herbarum, which doesn't have much of a plot, but I have been thinking of working in some of the poultices in other fandoms, sort of as a surprise crossover character, eh?
But more importantly, you've made me want to read Due's translation of The Aeneid, if his writing is like yours :-D
Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 02:44 pm (UTC)Well, as a claccisist I obviously feel that everyone should read Vergil XD Due's translation is pretty widely accepted as the new Danish standard in gymnasiet, even though some philologists criticize his language for not always being all that more modern than older translations. Despite that I'm frequently amazed at how seemingly easily he makes up the hexameters. It can be heavy stuff, but only reading (the extra cool awesome) excerpts is a valid option.
Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 09:23 am (UTC)Stress patterns are mostly lost on me, so thank you for explaining with the 'DUM-da-da-'DUM-da-da and the stress marks, it helped me read it the right way.
I felt the rhythm really lifted it, and I was lit with a fire of pride and vengeance like Dido. She's awesome, I love your AU. Much better than canon :-D
Beautiful and evocative language too, it was a pleasure to read. All you non-Danish readers, you're missing out.
Hvad godt gør at vorde en skygge indeed. I agree. And oooh, alliteration. Maybe my favorite is Kar'thago ham 'tjene - very satisfying!
Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 09:29 am (UTC)I'm glad the form worked for you; many of my co-students have serious hate for scanning poetry, but I love it.
Re: Vergil fanfic because that's how I roll
Date: 2010-10-13 10:08 am (UTC)Shame on Vergil. You did well to reclaim her for us ♥
Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-12 09:38 pm (UTC)Peter feels like the ground is being pulled from under his feet. Not in his worst nightmares had he imagined something like this.
"Well yes I did! You liked it, I know that. You liked chasing criminals, you liked the challenge."
"To a certain point, Peter. I hated being leashed, and I don't mean only the anklet. I hate the restrictions, I hate being bound by the law, hell, I'm starting to hate New York, because it's all I've seen in the last four years. I want to see Paris again, and Los Angeles and London and Rome and Jo'burg and Athens. I want to be able to go wherever I want. Not just where the Bureau sees fit to send me."
"So you want the 'freedom' of being a criminal, then?" Peter injects as much venom in his voice as he's able.
"Yes, yes I do. See you, Peter." Neal even manages to sound sad and a little wistful when he says it. Peter feels like it's all been a lie, as if he's never known Neal at all, like his partner and friend is a stranger.
He hates him so much in that instant, hates himself for caring.
Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-13 06:02 am (UTC)That was perfect.
Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-13 08:43 pm (UTC)Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-13 09:36 am (UTC)I understand the fannish appreciation for the power differential between Peter and Neal, and how that is magnified and kinked in fic and fanon, and how it is downplayed and negotiated to a non-issue too, but I've been hungering for a counter-point to it, where Neal does appreciate Peter as a person, working with him, and what Peter has done for him, but he would never voluntarily let his wings be cut.
Clever of you to write it from Peter's PoV, it shows both Neal's motivation and his new equilibrium having come to his decision as well as Peter's immediate pain and anger.
You convey that feeling of confusing, rage, self-hatred and suddenly seeing your ex as a stranger very well! I love it, the cathartic emotionality combined with an ability to see it from the outside at an intellectual distance :-D
Thank you!
Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-13 08:43 pm (UTC)I started writing it from Neal's POV, and then it wouldn't go anywhere until I realised it needed writing from Peter's POV, so I'm glad it worked for you :)
(Do you realise that your feedback is almost as long as the fic itself? XD)
Thank you!
Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-14 03:56 pm (UTC)Yup, the point of view definitely worked for me, I think it was a wise choice. You deserve lots of feedback for cheering me up :-D
Re: Four years and counting [White Collar]
Date: 2010-10-30 06:32 pm (UTC)Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-13 10:56 am (UTC)Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-13 04:55 pm (UTC)Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 07:27 am (UTC)There are some episodes I really would not have wanted to miss...
Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 03:58 pm (UTC)Thank you for the tip, I will look for that boxset!
Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 01:13 am (UTC)Lister wiped a tear from his eye and sniffled. "I'm not, man, it's just...well, we've been together through thick and thin."
"I know, but there comes a time in every hologram's life that he has to find his inner Ace Rimmer. I've found him now, and I think it's high time I let him out to live a little, with Princess Bonjela, the new love of my life, at my side."
"It's not gonna be the same around here without you."
"Oh, Listy. Try not to take it so hard. Be happy for me, out there, being a hero."
"I'll try," Lister nodded determinedly. "Just do one thing for me."
"Anything you want, Davy Boy, me old mate."
Lister pulled a black bra from his jacket pocket and held it out to Rimmer. "Give this back to Princess Bonjela when you see her."
Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 07:30 am (UTC)Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 05:25 pm (UTC)Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 04:01 pm (UTC)Very funny. I like all the pet names! The contrast of genuine emotion and absurd exaggeration and abrupt shifts in emotional atmosphere are very true to canon.
♥
Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 05:15 pm (UTC)One of the things I've always loved about Red Dwarf is the way the characters, in the middle of their hilarious jibing, actually develop a real affection for each other over time.
Re: Red Dwarf: Rimmer leaves the Space Corps
Date: 2010-10-14 06:08 pm (UTC)Prompt: House, MD
Date: 2010-10-14 02:06 am (UTC)Re: Prompt: House, MD
Date: 2010-10-14 04:05 pm (UTC)He has such a nice combination of prickliness and neediness.
Re: Prompt: House, MD
Date: 2010-10-15 04:18 am (UTC)*is evil w/ plot bunnies*
Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock
Date: 2010-10-14 03:36 am (UTC)They didn't know what hit them.
Of course they didn't know what hit them. Mai's uncle was the only member of the prison staff who knew about her fascination with knives, and she was fairly sure he'd let her keep them so that she could take her revenge - if she wanted it.
"What are you doing!"
Isn't it obvious? How did you survive this long as a prison guard, anyway? "Saving the jerk who dumped me."
It was one thing to break up with a girlfriend. Another to do it by letter.
To do it by letter left on the very couch you had snuggled on together with no chaperons not three days prior?
And that wasn't even the depths of what he had done.
A second later she was fighting the rush, doing all she could to keep the guards away from the line, to keep them from killing her uncle and her ex-boyfriend.
She succeeded, somehow.
It was the greatest sign she could have had that the realization she'd come to, that Zuko was right that there was something broken with their nation, and that he needed to be the one to fix it, was correct.
She hadn't expected to be able to do it, not alone. Not without Ty Lee and Azula.
It was the first time she'd really fought alone, no backup possible or expected.
She looked up at him as the gondola moved away, saw the shock and horror on his face.
Saw the scar on his cheek, the greatest symbol she knew of for just how broken the world had become - now that she was willing to recognize it.
Damn. If she'd realized earlier, she could have run with him when he left the Fire Nation.
Things could have been different.
There wouldn't have been the letter from him, or this last silent goodbye from her.
I'm probably going to die for this, she thought at him.
The look in his eyes told her he knew it too.
Make this count for something, please. Make a better world for my little brother.
Goodbye. Good luck.
...
Mai didn't expect Ty Lee to save her when Azula tried to be judge, jury, and executioner.
Mai didn't expect to be shoved into a prison uniform and then shoved into a cell with Ty Lee, far from the other prisoners, until decisions could be made about what to do with them.
And she certainly didn't expect to start crying.
"Mai?" Ty Lee put a hand on her shoulder. "It could be worse."
She couldn't argue with her friend. "It's not that."
"Then what is it?"
"Zuko."
"He'll be all right."
Mai nodded. She hoped he would be. She hoped he wouldn't try to free them.
She wondered what would happen if he ever did manage to return to the Fire Nation, if he ever gained access to the records, if he ever found out what their mothers had done shortly after the day he'd knocked her into the palace fountain to save her from a flaming apple.
She shook her head.
"Mai?"
"The mothers were right," she whispered, choking on the tears she was finally letting go of.
Ty Lee gasped.
They were words she would never hear from her mother, words every young noblewoman hoped she would hear.
(Instead, Mai had found out by listening to her parents' whispers after he was burned and banished, their worries that he wouldn't return before the arrangement had to be announced, their worries about their honor - not their daughter.)
The words that said she had already fallen in love with a man she was betrothed to, and wasn't it grand their mothers had known their children so well so young?
Words of joy, words of celebration.
Words that belonged to another life.
She had to survive in this one, now.
No use daydreaming he'd win soon, and sweep her away into a world where no one would grow up as she had again because no one would need to.
(She soon discovered night-dreaming was another matter.)
Re: Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock
Date: 2010-10-14 04:15 pm (UTC)I wish I had seen Avatar: The Last Airbender so I could better understand the context of your fic, but I get enough to feel gripped by the story you're telling.
What an astounding, world-rocking experience this has been for Mai. She's very brave to be able to not only risk her life to save her ex who dumped her like that, but also to take a hard look at her own culture and find it wanting.
Poor Mai. I hope she can find a new equilibrium she can live with. Hearing her parents be more concerned of their honor than about her must have burned, no pun intended :-(
I like her strength and determination, and her having a cell mate she can talk to, it gives me hope. Does your story have a happier ending for those who know canon?
Re: Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock
Date: 2010-10-14 08:04 pm (UTC)He wins the throne before the end of that summer (it's already past the summer solstice when this ficlet occurs), and she's freed fast enough that she and her friend both attend the coronation. Her last speaking scene is just before the coronation, and it's very clear that they are still a couple.
And yeah, her parents are pretty much like that in canon. She's emotionally flat in presentation most of the time because she was trained from early childhood not to risk her father's political standing by acting out in any way, ever.
Re: Avatar: TLA, during The Boiling Rock
Date: 2010-10-14 08:19 pm (UTC)Ugh, parents like that are scary. Good angst fodder, though :-)
Prompt: Psych - Shawn/Jules
Date: 2010-10-17 08:18 pm (UTC)Re: Prompt: Psych - Shawn/Jules
Date: 2010-10-17 08:35 pm (UTC)