A clarification for the privileged

[noracharles]

An emotion is not an opinion. We can not agree or disagree with an emotion, but we can sympathize (feel the same) or empathize (understand or care about the person's emotions).

An experience is not an opinion. We can not agree or disagree with it, but we can believe or disbelieve, or understand the experience being relayed.

An opinion is an opinion, and we can agree or disagree with it, or argue for or against it.

Someone who has a mental health issue and reacts in an unusual way emotionally may have emotions we can't sympathize with. But that doesn't mean we have to disbelieve their experiences, or disagree with their opinions.

Irrational is a not a synonym for wrong, or "thing I disbelieve" or "thing I disagree with."

Sane is not a synonym for right, or "thing I believe" or "thing I agree with."

And a pertinent example:

"Because of my social anxiety, I don't like having my fic archived on public archives, including the AO3" is not the same as "I have political or philosophical objections to the AO3".

When you use mental health to judge who are right and who are wrong in a disagreement, you are not just arguing for your opinion, you are also contributing to the oppression of all people with mental health issues (including those who agree with you about the matter at hand).

Comments

[jesse_the_k]

Thank you so much for this post and the others in the current time frame calling people out on disabling metaphor re: mental health. You have helped me understand why many interactions in my life have been frustrating. You have given me words for experiences, feelings & opinions I have, up til now, been unable to name. Go you!

ETA: In other words, also a clarification for those affected.

[noracharles]

Thank you! I can't tell you how happy that makes me :-D

Especially the thing about having my experiences put in doubt or my opinions discredited because of my atypical emotional reaction, or having people try to argue me out of my emotions because they assume they're opinions in disguise has been extremely frustrating to me in my life, and difficult and complicated to unpack.

Even in this discussion, I kept losing track, and feeling like I was supposed to defend or explain merricatk's emotions or behavior, when what I was really talking about was how people should not argue against her emotions or doubt her experience, so it was also written as a clarification for myself ;-)