Mainstream queer representation =|= slash pairings made canon.

[noracharles]

Dear slash fans who consider yourselves allies:

Queer people are distinguished from straight and cis people by our sexuality and/or gender vs. sex. Queer people are not defined by our sexuality and/or gender vs. sex.

As a shipper, I would not enjoy having a pairing I ship, be it het or slash, made canon, because I feel it takes the fun out of looking for subtext, and makes writing canon-compliant fic more difficult, since fic is written in the holes canon doesn't cover. That doesn't mean I don't very much enjoy canon pairings as well, both heterosexual and gay. I was happy when Willow/Tara and Veronica/Logan became canon, and was very entertained by their love stories as a viewer. I don't begrudge you your Jack/Ianto ship, just because I personally am not interested in reading or writing fic about canon pairings.

As a queer, I am hurt and upset that fellow fans who call themselves allies do not understand that it's not about our sex lives or genitals, and representation of us does not equal storylines about love or sex! I am not saying I prefer de-sexed characters like Will from "Will & Grace", I'm saying I prefer queer characters to be written like actual people with actual people motivations and interests, just like straight and cis characters ideally are!

I am cis gendered myself, and don't tend to look very hard for representation of gender queers. My interest in differently gendered or sexed characters is mostly from the exploitative, porn reading side of the fence, so I don't have any recs for you of shows doing it right.

But I can recommend a show which does butch woman right: Glee. I am butch myself (I am exactly as masculine as the completely average man according to the BBC sex id), and I love how Sue is written and acted. I don't know if she's a cis woman who's had a hysterectomy, a mtf trans woman or if she's intersexed, but I do know that she is an awesome, butch woman who is not vilified or mocked for being butch, and whose butchness is not a plot device.

A movie which does gay/bi man right is Blades of Glory. Coach's sexual orientation is completely irrelevant to the plot, and not exploited in any way. He's just an awesome skating coach. And a minor character >_<

I'm trying to think of a TV show I have a fannish interest in which does gay/bi man or woman right, and I can't think of any which didn't either sexually exploit, mock/vilify or problematize homo/bisexuality (we all get VD, we're all exposed to constant gay bashing, we're all sluts who'll die alone because we don't understand true love/partnership, we'll die young, we struggle with shame and self-loathing, etc.) in a crypto-homophobic way. I'm left looking for coded gay/bi characters, who pass for straight in the eyes of the straight viewers. I'm glad the coded gay/bi characters are there (and I'm fucking tired of straight people telling me they aren't), but I'd really, really like for my people to be openly represented on the fiction shows I watch.

In the future, please continue trying to be our allies. I like having you on our side. Try to separate your interest in slash from your demand for equal civil rights and an end to queerphobia. Don't ever, ever say that you don't want a character to be canonically gay/bi/trans if they aren't sexually appealing to you. Don't pretend like gay/bi women don't exist if you're a straight female fan of M/M slash, or like gay/bi men don't exist if you're a straight male fan of F/F slash. Consider carefully if you're writing/reccing a fic with a bi character, or a fic with a straight character whose true and pure love transcends gender in one very special case, but certainly isn't one of those sinful, dirty, icky homosexuals (we're-not-gay-we-just-love-each-other fic). Don't pretend like gender queer people don't exist, or are evil/wrong if they're not gay/bi, or aren't "real" women or men.

In conclusion: real queer people are not like your fictional fap fantasies. Please stop trying to squeeze us into that mold, or punishing us for not fitting in that mold. Please stop thinking that you are in any way helping queers when you campaign for more fan-service. Stop pretending that slash fic is the same as queer fic; some slash fic is also queer fic (all of my fic is), but most isn't. Scolding a slash fic for having male characters who don't act like real life gay/bi men is a misunderstanding. You wouldn't ask for more realistic racial stereotypes, would you? A better response would be to point out when a fic is only a slashy fantasy for straight people, when it is a queer interest fic, and when it's both: a queer slash fic.

I haven't had the time/energy to read any of the fic posted in queerlygen yet, but I recommend the comm to any slash fans reading this who're confused by my saying that slash isn't about queers, and queer representation isn't about sex and genitals.

Comments

[From: peoriapeoriawhereart]

Hi Nora.

I liked this essay. I did wonder however about slash fic that's humanist fic? That is, it is about some fan service, but it's also about the humanity of people.

But yes, I remember well the fail when Paramount couldn't get that calls for 'queer representation' didn't mean 'an extra special episode'.

Poor Will and poor (I can't recall the male of the matched set of gay and straight man-chasers.) Stuck in the cliches. Rarely is same sex attraction allowed to be represented in blue-collar/manual labor.

Read you later!

[From: noracharles]

Jack and Karen. Jack and Karen almost made that show worth watching. Good point about blue-collar character same sex attraction! I suppose they have the creative class writers not wanting to write blue collar characters, and the real or perceived macho culture of blue collar environments against them.

I don't hate or fear or feel oppressed by all slash fiction not written by and for queers. I certainly wouldn't be in slash fandom if I felt that way. When I myself write, I write from a feminist and/or humanist perspective. I try hard to portray my characters as realistic people and as realistic queers, but I don't care about portraying them as realistic men, and I don't demand that from other fic writers either.

I don't care if gay, bi and trans men can't see themselves in M/M slash (or M/F fic for that matter), they are not the target audience. I just want slashers to stop claiming that their fic is about and for queers, because they feel it gives them legitimacy, makes them cool or edgy, or makes them good people.

As a matter of fact, I don't much like gay fiction. I've read some, and find it tiresome. I can relate to being queer, and I can relate to common human elements, of course, but it's not something I want to seek out. I like lesbian and bisexual fiction. I love slash, and want and need it to be written from a humanist or feminist perspective. I don't want slash writers to try to emulate gay fiction in style or content.

[From: peoriapeoriawhereart]

Jack and Karen could be very entertaining. Much as Kat in 1st season Lois and Clark was.

I do think it's more transgressive, to write, if one is born or bred, to the creative classes, blue-collar characters. It's different gender norms. Of course, there is a dichotomy here that's pernicious, since I've seen plenty of blue-collars more creative, and some awful 'plugging' from the 'creative'. But it does speak to a social imagining.

Did you see Rat's link to the gay lit kerfluffle?

I find it interesting to unpack things so that a character can be a realistic person, a realistic queer, but perhaps not a realistic man.

I do know that when I write men (and boy, I write them a lot more than I write women) I tend to find their, not their feminine side (I can't say I have one) but their earth grounding, their emotions, their interaction with the world. With Jim Ellison I tend to call this his Mama Bear side.

Perhaps 'realistic man' and 'realistic woman' are closer to 'realistic racial stereotype'?

[From: noracharles]

I don't remember Kat. Lois & Clark was in syndication here, but they didn't show season one, because of Jimmy being played by a different actor than in the rest of the series.

I don't know what you mean by gay lit kerfuffle, so maybe I missed it. Do you mean that Lambda thing? I read about it on linkspam, but most of it had happened while I was on vacation, and I managed to stay away from it, since I didn't need the aggravation. Well, I managed to stay out of it until a few days ago. I'm helpless to resist metafandom links.

Perhaps 'realistic man' and 'realistic woman' are closer to 'realistic racial stereotype'?

Zing! That's why I love you, peoria.
Hmm, I think issues of power differential and also sheer numbers have to be taken into account here. Because of heterosexuality, women do have a bit of power in defining the male gender role, but I honestly believe that we have far less power in that regard than men like to claim.

Gender roles are evil and destructive for all individuals, because they do not allow us to be ourselves, and we are punished harshly for breaking the rules, but for society they are useful, they give structure and set ground rules for social interaction. And society is set up to serve men. (Some individuals crave and/or need that structure too, of course.) I think the male gender role is more comfortable for men than the female gender role is for women (power) and more roomy (freedom).

I do not think that for me to write a male character according to the male gender role is an act of oppression. For me to write female characters according to the female gender role is reinforcing the patriarchy, but the majority of people are women, and it is very rare for a man to be completely socially isolated from women and unaware of us.

Yes, there are men who aren't sure that women are real people, and I do think we need to take how women are portrayed in media extremely seriously, but the effects of doing it wrong are not as extreme. We aren't talking women unable to get a job, unable to keep custody of their children, unable to have a public disagreement with a stranger without fearing being lynched, etc. the way we are with minorities who are being dehumanized in public discourse.

People talk a lot of shit about women, and use horrible gendered insults to put us down. I've seen women referred to as animals in certain contexts, like askmen.com and porn. As a woman, I've had men comment on my body in very degrading ways, but they've always either done it in the belief I couldn't understand them (because of my ethnicity) or deliberately tried to provoke a response from me, fully aware of the transgressiveness of their act.

As a queer, I've heard people, even ones I up until then considered friends, discuss queers as if we were strange creatures, not real people. Commenting on our strange mating habits (as if we're the same just for being queer!), manner of dress and body language, talking about how horrible and disgusting we are, how it would be impossible to live near queers, or be in a room with one. How giving us equal civil rights would destroy the fabric of society. How it would be child abuse to give queers custody of their own kids, or allow them to adopt or allow them access to medical assistance with conception. How the non-biological parent of a queer couple's kids isn't really a parent, never mind that straight people are really the parents of their adopted/donor children. All this right in front of me, with absolutely no regard to my feelings, and how extremely debasing and humiliating that is for me.

Women are considered lesser than men by many people. Queers are considered less than human by many people. So no, I don't think writing according to gender roles is the equivalent of writing according to stereotypes.

I tend to work with writing male characters the same way you do. I don't think the emotions and motivations I ascribe them are unrealistic for men, given that they are realistic for people and based on canon, but from feedback I've receive from men I think that the voice I use for them is feminine, I break some unwritten rules about which subjects to discuss when and how, and based on femslash by male writers I've read, I probably display my ignorance in many subtle ways. (For example, many men honestly believe that women have fewer hair follicles than men, and we don't have hair on our arms and legs, that the hair on our heads is naturally soft, smooth, shiny and detangled, that we naturally have a flawless, finished complexion, that we don't have body odor, and other lies women tell men. They're also generally very ignorant about our genitals, but then again, so are women.)

While I wish my writing about male characters didn't make men so acutely uncomfortable that they feel queasy, I don't particularly care if they think my writing is too femme. I don't like butch writing, don't want to read it, and see no point in writing it.

What I want from straight people writing queers characters is a realization that real people are not fictional characters, real people are real. Of course there are far more damaging ways of portraying queers in fiction than the typical soppy slash stereotypes, but the underlying problem is the same: Many people, slashers included, have trouble understanding that we're really real, we don't have a secret gay agenda to destroy society and call down hurricanes, and we're not here to entertain straight people.

I've been saying for years that slash and queer fic is not the same, though they may overlap, but people have become very angry and defensive with me, to the point where I just didn't want to have that argument. Straight people obviously want to keep their toys, and not have to consider the feelings and interests of real people they may be messing with, but queer fans are also very protective of slash as queer expression and a safe place for queers, and of their straight friends who couldn't possibly be homophobes.

I sympathize a lot with that. Slash fandom is also a relatively safer space for me. I can be out and proud without fear here, in an environment where people may think I'm odd and disquieting for being queer, but they won't say it because it's against the unwritten rules. I love slash fic, as literature, and as a way of celebrating my own lifestyle. And I love my friends in fandom. It broke my heart when I had to admit to myself that someone close to me was a raging homophobe, and I had closed my eyes to it for a long time because I didn't want to believe that. Lots of friends and acquaintances online have said homophobic things, but it hurts more from someone who should know better, and claims to be an ally. So with the whole Lambda thing, and a comment to a meta post I recently read, I got so angry that I couldn't sleep and had to get up and rant about it here.